Cedar Forests

Burning cedar is what I smell right after
a depressive episode.
Burning cedar after a forest fire -
the smell would stay with me
for days, eventually
dissipating.

The burning cedar though
is no longer present -
with words, with body language,
with your voice calling
out to me -
the cedar woods no longer
burn
for days,
no longer burning -

Instead,
growth,
buds rising,
a spring unlike which
I have known.

Burned and dead cedars,
giving life to the forest
anew -

all because of you.

No Mere CinderFella

Do you see that clock hanging on the wall?
It struck midnight a few hours ago -
you know what that means?
That means, this carriage isn't turning into a pumpkin,
I'm still slayin' with my ball gown on -

Stayed home all day, worked and cleaned,
made home feel more welcome than the dungeon
it was with you under its roof;

Not a single tear or depressive episode -
fun, dancing, singing loudly with wild abandon,
no more shushin' from my second worst critic;

They say you should learn one thing a day,
I learned that I need no prince nor princess to save me -
I am my own savior -
don't need a dragon/demon to ride or slay,
this isn't a fantasy, this is me standing up for
myself and smiling in the face of reality.

Keep the glass shoe,
it'll fit when you call me a hypocrite.

Help is What We Deserve (and Need)

maybe it's all just a figment of my imagination,
maybe it's all created as a dramatic distraction,
maybe it's not even real
and I'm chasing my own ghosts,

but what if it is there;
what if it's not a figment,
not a creation for distraction,
what if these ghosts are more than mist,
what if these monsters are real -

I've named them, given them space,
don't make them pay rent but I carry on
anyway.

hellish children are these,
their names vile and putrid in my mouth,
born of the sickness from my brain,
my spawn; anxiety and depression.
a bad infomercial on how to deal with despicable
children, the question:
how do I get better - how do I win against my own demons
that claw and rake and twist
my mind?

The remedy is
here for the taking,
every person is able to
receive it, all we have to do is
accept the help and
push the little mind-killer fear away and
yearn for release.